Navigating Wedding Season & Summer Events with Children on the Autism Spectrum
Intro by Dr. Autumn Flick
I remember hearing parents share their overwhelming joy that they could finally take their daughter to a wedding after avoiding it before receiving services from Orchid. Wedding celebrations were a big part of their family and culture. They had avoided them because of their child's meltdowns and feelings of shame and guilt. Now, they are proud of going to these events.
With the summer months come many weddings and other celebrations that can pose challenges for families who have a child with autism. Here are tips for preparing to ensure your family can fully engage in these celebrations!
Key Building Block Skills
Applied Behavior Analysis (ABA) helps break down complex skills into manageable building blocks that can be taught systematically. Here are some key building block skills to target in helping to prepare your child for wedding season and other summer events:
Adaptive Skills 🛠️
Using Public Restrooms: Practice using porta-potties or public bathrooms in a less stressful environment. Teach them the steps involved, including waiting in line and proper hygiene.
Eating with Plastic Utensils: Familiarize your child with using plastic plates, forks, and knives. Have meals at home using these items to build comfort.
Sitting on Unfamiliar Seating: Help your child get used to sitting on benches or folding chairs by incorporating these types of seats into their daily routines.
Eating from a Buffet: Teach your child how to navigate a buffet line, including waiting their turn, refraining from grabbing other people’s food, selecting food, and carrying their plate. Practice at home with a mock buffet setup.
Communication Skills 🗣️
Requesting Help: Teach your child to ask for help or a break when overwhelmed. Use visual aids or simple phrases like "I need help" or "I need a break."
Expressing Needs: Ensure they can communicate basic needs, such as hunger, thirst, or the need for the bathroom. Practice using phrases or picture cards.
Social Skills 🤝
Greeting Others: Practice simple greetings like saying “hello” or waving. Role-play different scenarios where they might need to greet people.
Turn-Taking: Engage in games or activities that involve taking turns to help your child learn patience and cooperation.
Self-Regulation Skills 🧘
Recognizing Emotions: Help your child identify their emotions and understand their feelings. Use emotion charts or social stories.
Calming Strategies: Teach techniques such as deep breathing, counting to ten, or using a comfort item to self-soothe when feeling anxious.
Quiet Mouth: Teach a visual cue for having a quiet mouth during wedding ceremonies, speeches, or other moments.
Preparation Tips
1. Prepare in Advance 📅
Preparation is key. Start by discussing the upcoming event with your child well in advance. Use social stories, visual schedules, or role-playing to help them understand what to expect. Familiarizing your child with the sequence of events can reduce anxiety and make them feel more comfortable.
2. Visit the Venue Ahead of Time 📍
If possible, visit the venue before the actual event. This can help your child become familiar with the new environment. If a visit isn’t feasible, show them pictures or videos. Knowing what the location looks like and what activities will take place can be incredibly reassuring.
3. Create a Sensory-Friendly Plan 🧸
Large gatherings can be overwhelming due to noise, crowds, and new sensory experiences. Pack a sensory toolkit that includes noise-canceling headphones, fidget toys, and a weighted blanket. Identify a quiet space where your child can take breaks if they feel overstimulated.
4. Stick to Routines ⏰
While it’s impossible to follow routines exactly during events, maintain some elements of your child’s daily schedule. Bring familiar foods if the event’s menu is unpredictable, and stick to regular meal and nap times as closely as possible. Consistency provides comfort and can help your child manage the changes.
5. Communicate with Event Hosts 🗣️
Communicate your child’s needs to the event hosts beforehand. Let them know about any specific accommodations that might help, such as having a quiet area available or adjusting the music volume. Most people are happy to assist if they understand the importance.
6. Plan for Flexibility 🔄
Have an exit strategy in case your child becomes too overwhelmed. This might mean stepping outside for a break, leaving the event early, or finding a quiet room where they can decompress. Flexibility is crucial to ensure that your child’s needs are met without adding stress.
7. Incorporate Special Interests 🎶
If your child has special interests, try incorporating them into the event. For example, if they love a particular type of music, see if you can include it in the playlist. Personal touches can make the event more enjoyable and engaging for them.
8. Utilize Support Networks 👫
Don’t hesitate to enlist the help of family and friends. A support network can alleviate some pressures and provide additional hands to assist your child. Whether it’s a trusted relative or a family friend, having someone who understands your child’s needs can make a significant difference.
9. Celebrate Successes 🎉
Focus on the positives and celebrate the small victories. Whether it’s a successful social interaction, a moment of calm amidst the chaos, or simply participating in the event, acknowledge and celebrate these achievements. Positive reinforcement builds confidence and encourages your child to engage more in future events.
Conclusion
With thoughtful preparation, a proactive approach, and a focus on building key skills, you can help your child successfully navigate wedding season and summer events. Creating a supportive environment and incorporating strategies tailored to your child’s needs can turn these occasions into positive and memorable experiences for the entire family. Remember, flexibility, communication, and a bit of planning go a long way in making these moments enjoyable for everyone.
